Sweaty Bullets Character Bios

Sweaty Bullets

Character Bios

(This section shall)

Smiley blasting stuff, of course Smiley Gunman
Occupation: Violent criminal.
Age: 25
A violent criminal and gun nut. He typically only smiles in the presense of perversity or boobs. Smiley is actually a failed attempt to plagiarize, er, pay tribute to, Riff from the much-better-than-mine strip Sluggy Freelance.

Gun Girl, armed with cleavage. Gun Girl Smithenwesson
Occupation:?
Age: 22
Smiley's current love interest; she has both guns and boobs. Despite being rather slutty, she is basically a good person who just wants to be loved. She does not share Smiley's violent tendencies. If she were to marry Smiley, her name would be Gun Girl Gunman; I realized this only after planning their relationship, so their future is unsure.

Nameless being boring. Nameless Friend
Occupation: Junior Computer Guy at TechCo, Inc.
Age: 23
Smiley's best friend. They share a house. Nameless is a computer geek who tolerates Smiley's homocidal tendencies because they are sometimes amusing. It's a reasonable assumption that Nameless will never get laid. He is very boring, but provides occasional computer jokes.

Mooey, uh, being a cow. Mooey the Disembodied Cow
Occupation: Cow impregnator (retired)
Age: 47 in cow years
A disembodied cow (bull, actually). Mooey is the only entity ever accidentally killed by Smiley, so he has a special place among the group. He speaks English fluently, but has a highly improbable speech impediment that causes his speech to be suspiciously cow-like. It has been discovered that Mooey's speech can be understood when intoxicated. Sadly, Mooey is the most interesting character in the strip.


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	Smiley Gunman Occupation: Violent criminal. Age: 25 A violent criminal and gun nut. He typically only smiles in the presense of perversity or boobs. Smiley is actually a failed attempt to plagiarize, er, pay tribute to, Riff from the much-better-than-mine strip Sluggy Freelance.
	Gun Girl Smithenwesson Occupation:? Age: 22 Smiley's current love interest; she has both guns and boobs. Despite being rather slutty, she is basically a good person who just wants to be loved. She does not share Smiley's violent tendencies. If she were to marry Smiley, her name would be Gun Girl Gunman; I realized this only after planning their relationship, so their future is unsure.
	Nameless Friend Occupation: Junior Computer Guy at TechCo, Inc. Age: 23 Smiley's best friend. They share a house. Nameless is a computer geek who tolerates Smiley's homocidal tendencies because they are sometimes amusing. It's a reasonable assumption that Nameless will never get laid. He is very boring, but provides occasional computer jokes.
	Mooey the Disembodied Cow Occupation: Cow impregnator (retired) Age: 47 in cow years A disembodied cow (bull, actually). Mooey is the only entity ever accidentally killed by Smiley, so he has a special place among the group. He speaks English fluently, but has a highly improbable speech impediment that causes his speech to be suspiciously cow-like. It has been discovered that Mooey's speech can be understood when intoxicated. Sadly, Mooey is the most interesting character in the strip.